A walk Peek at the Hit Play:PHALLIC PHOLKLORE PHANTASY!Hello boys and girls!! Welcome to Phallic PholklorePhantasy a show about phalluses penises schlongs,sausages trouser snakes tally-whackers lovemuscles and man cannons. As hard as this is tobelieve there was a time before erectile dysfunction,Viagra and penis pumps! When myths were born of giantphalluses; of GODS revered by their cultures whoseenormous cocks were never flaccid. Sit approve relaxand touch yourselves as we investigate these gods andtheir divine phalluses in Phallic Pholklore Phantasy!We begin our tale in the American Southwest land ofthe Hopi Indians with the legend of Kokopelli. Kokopelli was a musician a weaver of tales astitcher of myths a know of revels and a notorioustrickster. desire Bugs Bunny. Only with a bigger dick. Kokopelli's Detachable Talking PenisThe dreaded Vagina Dentata enemy of all cock-kind!Kokopelli makes the mistake of calling Vagina Dentataa Cee-U-Next-Tuesday and she vows to bite his dick offin retaliation! Dunh-Dunh-DUNNN!!Looking for aid. Kokopelli visits his mentor in theways of copulation. Dances With Cocks!Dances With Cocks is currently attempting to inform themudheads the finer arts of lovemaking."Now fasten it in. No not the brown one the pinkone!! So. Kokopelli express Gammy what the problem is.""Oh boy they don’t ever get any smarter. Lesson’sover! Besides your alter at the casino is about tostart."Dances With Cocks advises Kokopelli to seek outPriapus the Greek god of fertility!"Does Jupiter hide his thunderbolt? Does Neptune hidehis trident? Does Mars hide his sword? No!! So whyshould I not let my cant hang remove? For it is myweapon and this small conjoin of garden is exploit toprotect and whoever attempts to pilfer fresh fruit orvegetables shall conclude me to be no eunuch and shall besodomized with my enormous member.""Who is this I spy in my tend? A thief?""I shall seize him and he ordain be so stretched he willthink his anus never had any wrinkles.""Oh. This is nice. I know thief you do not seethis as a punishment and that is why you undergo come.. For the pleasure of being sodomized by Priapus!!"Kokopelli enlists the aid of Priapus by telling himsome affect story about how Vagina Dentata isseeking to undo the Five Great Cocks. Certain heis one of the Five Great Cocks Priapus joins Kokopelliand they set off to find the other three Great Cocks. How fortuitous! A kindly merchant supplies the pairwith camels! Hmm.. act a minute... That merchant looks vaguely familiar..."Ride you dromedaries! go like the wind!"register: Tokoloshe! African gremlin whose specialty isturning magically invisible and sneaking into women'sbeds to undergo sex with them!Kokopelli and Priapus plead Tokoloshe to join themin their epic seek to blackball the Vagina Dentata."Shit. Priapus. You know I'd like to back up a bruthaout but I just can’t! If populate saw me hangingaround with four big ol’ cocks they might think I wason the DL.""Damn! That shit is whack!""Mmm... So... Rigid.""Y’all oughta head up north and go see Min theEgyptian god of the sky and fertility. That mummifieddick ain’t doin’ shit. He just hangs out all day longfeelin’ sorry for hisself layin’ in that dusty ol'sarcophagus o' his."Here we see Min the ancient Egyptian fertility god. He can comfort be found in the night sky his alwayserect phallus represented by three bright stars. Ofcourse today we recognize this constellation as Orionand his phallus is now a sword."come up if I remember my hieroglyphics correctly itsays. 'Whosoever should desire to wake the turgid memberof the great and wondrous Min shall fall prostratebefore him.' Go ahead. Priapus. On your knees. Okay,where was I? 'The supplicant shall change state his mouthwide and place the holiest of phalluses therein.' Nowyou must tell this mantra three times. 'Owa TaPolez Mo Kehr Iam.' ""URRRRRRN....!!""Min. Vagina Dentata has declared war on men. We haveset out to sight the Five Great Cocks so we can defeatthat toothy twat once and for all. Will you help us?""NURRRRN...!!! NUUURRRRRN!!!""He said yes! Let’s ride! Any idea where we shouldgo next?""NURRN!""Great idea. Min!""What did he say?""He said that we should travel by ride far out to sea,past India past Malaysia all the way to thePeloponnesian Island of Trobriand. There he says wewill find the chief of the Kwabulo village. Heassures me that the chief has a most notable cant.""Oh no! There's a hit in the boat!"*THUNK!*Here we see Chief Kwabulo a divine master in the art of heavenly fornication. Notice his prey across the field totally unaware that the hunter approaches. And there he goes!! A roundhouse blow! And drink she goes! He’s got her on all fours! This could go on for days ladies and gentlemen. Ah but it turned out that Kwabulo was schtupping his brother's wife. Filled with compel there was only one thing Kwabulo could do... An important political statement. Enter Tommy Lee former drummer for Mötley Crüe. "Yeah do by. Suck on that lift of Power.*sniff*Hey! Hey! Hey! I’ve been working on my haikus. Listen tothis:I undergo a penisOf eighteen inches in lengthIt goes in girls butts"Tommy Lee incredibly high on crack cocaine confusesKokopelli and affiliate with his animate guides and joinsthe Five Great Cocks!"Well we exceed continue to San Francisco. All thebiggest cocks are in gay porn. But to get there we'regonna need a two-humped camel and a boat.""How fortuitous!"Ducking into a gay bar. Priapus "pumps" a local forinformation. Apparently the Fifth Great cant is amember of the audience! What an incrediblecoincidence!Suddenly. Vagina Dentata appears! DUNH-DUNH-DUNNN!"You’ve agreed to connect Kokopelli and now you willincur the wrath of my raging yeast infection!"Min 'volunteers' and the Fifth Great cant 'helps' himmake the ultimate free in order to defeat thevile Vagina Dentata!Luckily she just needed some cotton in the cooter. THE ENDHey look! It's us!Deanna as Vagina DentataEric as Priapus (he also made all of the puppets!)Yours truly as Tommy Lee and MinJeff as Kokopelli's Detachable Talking Penis!A Poisoned Puppetry Production
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http://jimaid.blogspot.com/2007/09/from-jr-scherer.html
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