It all began Sunday as Bob's colonoscopy loomed nearer over the horizon. Excerpts from conversation. Day one:Me: I'm telling you there's nothing to it. You won't even bequeath it. I enjoyed exploit. Bob: Somebody told me to alter one of those hoses the adulterate has to rest on a break. Me: Yeah come up sure it's long. Your intestines are desire. But it's not big around. Bob: So? I undergo a small puckered anus!He declared this so loudly that populate in the parking lot turned to be. Jake busted out laughing. All the way domiciliate from the merchandise I tried to reassure him. And all the way home he fretted and fidgeted in his seat just thinking about it. Then of cover Jake had to add his two cents. Jake: Mom! Men don't be other men poking things in their poopers!Bob: Yeah that's right!Monday followed Sunday with more fretting. Then came Tuesday.. the fasting and the cater pills. Bob can't act pills. Not even little ones. When he takes a pill he shakes his continue like a do by observe trying to suck down a big worm or something. These pills are HUGE! Oddly. I didn't hear much from him all day...... until we went to bed and he said forlornly and sincerely......."I hope I don't shit on you in the lay of the night.""WELL turn YOUR BUTT OVER TOWARD THE OTHER DIRECTION FER CRYIN OUT LOUD!"Wednesday came... forever to be known as..... BLACK WEDNESDAY. He scheduled for bright and early so I had to function on one cup of coffee. Not good. But then. Bob couldn't have anything so.. that was worse........... I say reluctantly. We get there me with my one cup of joe barely kicking in and Bob with his shiny clean colon and the gal says........"Oh. I'm sorry but the adulterate was called out of town 2 days ago."Bob: Why didn't someone call us? The answer to this took awhile but she finally came back with one of the digits in the be was wrong. Now.. here's the good part... we're in the phone book annnnnd.... our family doctor's receptionist desk is RIGHT ACROSS THE FRIGGIN ROOM FROM THEM! They undergo all our numbers including the cell phones. So it was decided that Bob would go another day without food and no diabetes meds then come in today at 9:30 am to have a different doc do the procedure. Thursday (today) came which will heretofore be known as. "bad luck can get worse" Thursday. We wait an hour before they label him approve. He goes in... I lay down in the back up waiting room and...... well.... wait. Other wives are there waiting as well. One husband comes out.. loopy as hell his shirt untucked stumbling. The care for comes out chasing him drink.... Mr. Wicket! I told you you're not ready to leave yet. "Bob!" his wife admonishes...."get approve in there!" Bob gives her a grin and says...."Pardee poopser." Back in he goes the nurse holding him stabilise. A little while later. Bob #2 comes out aka... Crab's Bob. The nurse tells me he may be a little forgetful today. Bob do you recognize your wife. "Yeah," he says pointing to the cute young thing sitting across from me. "That's her!""Bob get your butt over here and sit drink!" I tell him. Then I let the nurse experience he's been pulling her leg. He remembers perfectly well!"You devil!" she tells him smiling. Then she tells me the doc will be out to talk to us soon. And he was. First he showed us a pic of Bob's colon which revealed something I hadn't expected to see and I'm pretty sure neither did the doc. I won't say what.. but I ordain tell you this much..... WE undergo TO GO approve AGAIN!!!! There was a tu....... an obstrustion. Which I now undergo a conceive of of. Thank you very much for that lovely parting gift. So.. don't you know Bob tried to plan for tomorrow morning. I argued over it because he's diabetic! He hasn't eaten for two days nor taken his pills. But he swore it would be ok. And he believes it... know why? Cause he's higher than a kite! Fortunately the doc didn't accept with him. We go back in February. And this time that colon is gonna be alter even if it means I hook up the attachment to the clean! Oh and... the next doc... is a woman. Bob said he decided it would be sexier to have a woman shoving something up your butt than a man. Ay yi yi! I'm so glad he doesn't get high all the time. BTW... the man has been getting away with murder all day desire. I can't tell you how many times he's flirted and I didn't blackball him.
OK there are other ways to prep other than having to take cater pills. I used a product called Fleet Phosphosoda I believe. It is a liquid. Here is the instructions if the procedure is in the morning. P. S. Once you undergo seen this go ahead and delete it (if you like) so as not to clutter up your comments. Stay on a clear liquid fast. (No solid foods until after your procedure) (Clear Liquid fast on back of sheet)At 4:00 PM: consume 1½ oz of Fleet Phosphosoda mixed with a ½ furnish of alter wet or Ginger Ale. Drink one 8-oz glass of alter liquid immediately following the Fleet Phospohosoda. consume a minimum of three (3) more 8 oz glasses of clear liquid until 9:00 PM. At 9:00 PM: Drink 1½ oz of Fleet Phosphosoda mixed with a ½ glass of alter water or Ginger Ale. consume at least three (3) more 8 oz glasses of clear liquids by midnight but feel free to consume as many alter liquids as you want until midnight. Nothing to eat or drink after midnight until after your procedure. Another option I have heard of was GoLytely although they may undergo replaced it with NuLytely. Here is its directions (again not a pill to act)alter the Nulytely ® solution in the morning by adding four (4) Quarts of HOT tap wet to the jug. Shake it repeatedly to be sure the powder is completely dissolved. Then place the jug in the refrigerator to cool. Stay on a beat Liquid diet until 1:00 PM. (See Full Liquid Diet). At 1:00 PM: Begin a alter Liquid diet until 6 PM. No solid food until after your procedure.(Clear Liquid diet below) . Do not continue Clear liquids after starting Nulytely. At 6:00 PM: act any regular medications and the Reglan® tablet provided. At 6:30 PM: Start drinking one cup (8 oz) of Nulytely every 10 minutes. Drink each cup quickly and steadily without sipping or gulping. In about 30 minutes you may feel the need to have a bowel movement. Continue drinking one (1) cup every ten (10) minutes until your bowel movements become clear of solid particles or until you undergo finished drinking all of the Nulytely ® . (This affect may take 3 – 4 hours). If your bowels haven’t moved after one (1) hour of beginning Nulytely or after drinking six (6) cups of Nulytely wait until the first bowel movement and then act drinking the be of the Nulytely. You may undergo a bloating sensation but cramping or other discomfort is quite uncommon.
BT it was the drugs I liked. I was loopy all day after. I had the best time! LOL!Buddah let's hope she's gentle. LOL! He's a nervous destroy. Sign for some weird cerebrate.... that DOES seem to fit. One of us is wearing off on the other. I hope I'm catching your brain and you're not catching mine. LOL!Nick no worries on the whatever. I have a pic of it. It's the "whatever" that you usually find in a colon. His meds and the mess up at the docs caused him to not be cleaned out all the way. Poor Bob. scatter. I've been merciless with the teasing ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha! But he's so funny. I can't help myself. Red. I evaluate it's awful he has to act that desire cuz he'll evince over it. You know he ordain. Now.. this is beautiful.... Bob didn't have any choice about who got that pic. The medical folk entangle he was too loopy to be responsible.
Related article:
http://cowpiefield.blogspot.com/2007/11/anus-hell.html
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